About three months ago, we discovered toxic black mold underneath our kitchen sink. Two weeks after that, Anne and I packed up some bags and moved ourselves and our dogs out of our house, while a team of hazardous materials removal dudes tore apart our kitchen and made our house look like Breaking Bad.
A month after we moved out, we were able to come back into our house, because the mold (which originally appeared to be a few square feet, and ended up being much, much worse) had been successfully removed. The only problem with getting back into our house was our kitchen remained (and remains) torn up. Our refrigerator is in the middle of our living room. Our dishwasher is on our patio. We have no sink, so there’s no running water, so we can’t cook.
It’s all a real pain in the ass, and it’s made this entire summer feel like something we are enduring, rather than living.
But.
It’s important to me that I keep and maintain perspective. Starting at the very beginning of this, with the toxic black mold: nobody got sick, and we discovered it just before it spread into the walls in a way that would force us to literally tear our house down.
Insurance denied our claim for reasons that I think are bullshit. We tried and failed to fight their denial, and while it’s infuriating that they got away with it, we’re very grateful and very lucky that the whole thing didn’t cost as much as we feared, and we’re grateful and lucky that we can afford to pay for it out of pocket.
We had to be out of our house for over a month, but our friends let us stay in their home (they were out of the country), so we didn’t have to endure the cost and weirdness of living in a hotel for thirty days. We got to take our dogs with us, and we were in such a quiet and unfamiliar location, it gave me the solitude I needed to focus and finish the manuscript of the novel I was writing.
Did I bury the lede on that? My novel is currently with my editor, and even though I still need to do some work on it, it’s that much closer to being finished and published. That’s kind of a big deal for me.
Our same friends offered us their house in Hana if we wanted to get out of town for a little bit, and Anne used points and miles to get us an unexpected vacation in Hawaii for less than the cost of a single plane ticket. I’m grateful for that.
After we got back from Hana, we were able to move back into our house, even though the kitchen was (and is) all torn apart. We’ve had to eat out for every meal, which has not been awesome, but I’m grateful that we can afford that, and that we live in a place that has lots of healthy and affordable options to feed ourselves. I’ve been joking that we’re sort of like college students who eat out of take away containers, but with a fancy budget.
When we got back into our house about a month ago, we expected to live in the chaos for about five days, before everything was finished and restored to the way it was before … but everything takes longer than expected, and as of this morning, my refrigerator is still in the middle of my living room.
But.
I’m grateful that this summer has been, in perspective, a series of mild inconveniences that haven’t wrecked our lives. I’m grateful that Anne found someone who could replace our hardwood floor with an exact match, even though the boards in our house haven’t been made since the 1940s. I’m grateful that they matched the floors perfectly. I’m grateful that they were able to rebuild our cabinets and save our countertops so perfectly, you can’t even tell that they’re new. I’m grateful that the people who have done all this work on our home have been kind, honest, hard workers (who my dogs love, which is important. If your dogs don’t like someone, respect that, because dogs seem to have good instincts about people for some reason.) I’m grateful that, when this is all finished, I don’t think we’ll be able to tell that anything ever happened, because everything is matching close to perfectly.
I haven’t spent this summer making things, like I wanted to. I haven’t started writing anything new. I haven’t spent any time on my blog since June, and though it feels weird, I haven’t really missed it. I feel like I am in this part of my creative cycle where I absorb and consume and get inspired by other people’s creations, so I am nourished and ready for the output part of my creative cycle, whenever it decides to arrive.
I’ve spent this summer reading lots of books, and watching almost one movie a day. I know that sounds like goofing off and fucking around, but for me, it’s a fundamental part of my creative life and my creative self. I get inspired by good things and bad things, and I’ve consumed a lot of both this summer. I have found the same kind of comfort and familiarity in a book that I had when I was a kid: no matter where I am or what’s going on, I can open a book and lose myself in it. I’ve found so much happiness and comfort in the books I’ve read this summer, it’s inspired me to dedicate myself to finishing my novel asap, so I can maybe give people who read it the same escape and happiness I’m getting.
For my novel, I needed to find a slasher movie from pre-83 that wasn’t Friday the 13th or Halloween. It needed to be something that the kids in my story would have rented at the video store, and even though I could have gotten away with using one of those popular and well-known films, I wanted to find something different for reasons I’ll get into when I start writing my “here’s how I did it” posts about the novel, in the run up to its release. The upshot of this is that I’ve watched a TON of early 80s slasher movies this year, and holy shit am I primed to write and make one of my own, because I understand them at a granular level I didn’t think was possible, and I want to see what happens when I make my version of that kind of thing, even if it’s just a short script.
I’m grateful for the time I’ve had to do that level of research (some of them have been fun to watch, others are just terrible, but it’s always been worth it), and I wouldn’t have made the time if my house hadn’t been torn apart. Maybe I’ll even work an unfinished kitchen into the story, as an homage to this whole shitshow.
So. It’s been a summer of mild inconveniences, and I’m grateful and lucky that it isn’t so much worse. I’m grateful for the life I have, and for the people I get to share it with, especially my best friend and wife, Anne. I hope that, wherever you are and whatever your personal circumstances are, you get to share your life with someone who is as special to you as Anne is to me. I hope that you have the privilege (like I do) of looking at bummer things that happen, and finding some perspective that makes them feel less frustrating and annoying than they could be.
This is the first post I’ve written since I deactivated my Twitter. I wonder if anyone will see it? I wonder if I’m wrong about Twitter not making any difference in blog traffic or book sales. I’m going to feel really silly if I am. Anyway, I hope you’re having a good summer, and I hope that any inconveniences you have encountered have been mild.
Thanks for listening.
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Thank you for the post! Glad to hear that the mold is out and that your book will soon come to fruition. Its so nice to accomplish goals even if its one at a time. Keep it up!!
Sounds like a summer that epitomizes the phrase “make the best of it”. I’m glad that things are moving for you, even if it’s a….clunking along, and hope they smooth out for you soon.
Deactivated Twitter about 30 minutes ago. Just read your post. Hope life returns to some semblance of normal for your soon. Look forward to your book. I’ve had a great summer. Excited to attend the Michigan Comic Con in Detroit with my brother and son tomorrow.
Historically, when I take vacation I tend to get sick. This year… I was able to take 3 weeks. And was totally healthy for the duration. My wife got sick.
Thanks for writing. I’m always happy to listen.
Re: Seeing this after you deactivated Twitter
Ayup. I follow you on all the things, but got to here from Tumblr. Would have seen it on facebork as well, I imagine.
Condolences on your kitchen, I hope it feels better soon. It’s hard when the heart of the house is defunct, even for a short time.
Sounds like pretty decent summer to me, you’re making it through and look at it this way, with your refrigerator in your living room all you have to do is just barely get up from the couch to grab a beer you don’t even have to walk all the way into the kitchen, the plus side right?
Oh, I wish. It’s unplugged.
You and Anne could paint it black and play “Also sprach Zarathustra” while dancing around it.
If my fridge was in my living room I would eventually end up being extracted by forklift. 😨
Glad to read your post and happy you’ve had some time off to relax! Looking forward to your novel when it comes out! I stopped using twitter when a certain person got into office and haven’t missed it! Hope your fall is productive and happy!
I loved this blog and I’m so happy that you pulled good stuff out pains in the posterial region. I’m not really into slasher stuff, but lots of my family members are. That sounds a bit disturbing. Anyway, I’m looking forward to adding a blip to your sales with Christmas presents. I’m also so glad you have friends and family around you to help pull you through the icky stuff. Gosh, that makes a huge difference. Anyway, in my book, you’re agood kid! I’m always glad to hear what you say!
I don’t tweet.. so I didn’t realize you were ‘off’ twitter. Just wanted you to know that some people are still listening. 😉 Glad the kitchen is going back together well. I’ll be waiting to hear that your book has been listed for pre-sales.
Enjoy the rest of your summer..
So, what movie did you settle on to use in the book?
I think I’m going to keep that a secret and let it unfold in the book’s narrative.
Sounds like a lovely Summer 🙂
I don’t have nor have I ever had twitter – those of us who love you and what you stand for will find you on whatever platform you make home!
This. Exactly this.
I’m not sure I want to know the answer, but what about Luna?
She’s great! She moved up the street about a year ago, because she decided she didn’t want to live with us and Marlowe. She loves her new family, a retired couple who are up the block. They love her, and we see her when we are on our walks.
Oh, awesome. It’s good you are still friends! 🙂
I’m so glad you are able to make lemonade out of lemons. It’s such an important skill, or mindset, it makes all the difference in whether a person is content with their life or miserable. And I’m excited that your novel is closer to publication! Can’t wait to read it! I am not a slasher film fan, but I’ll be interested in any insights you come up with about that genre. I read your Twitter posts but I’m not on Twitter, so if you decide to leave it entirely, I’ll still be checking out your blog. You’ve got so many helpful and kind thoughts to share, you’re a treasure.
Unfortunately I have to read your blog as I follow it on WP…LOL Change is actually the most stress that a human can go through…having moved a couple of months ago and only just now getting things sorted…still have to the painting though 🙂
Oh and don’t watch Evil Dead…I did back in the 80’s age 15 and still have nightmares!
Because I use RSS feeds for everything Twitter is pretty irrelevant to me. 🙂
RSS for the win!
Who needs Twitter anyway? Trump? By deleting your account you rid yourself of the carrots rantings also.. Another delight! 😉 good luck on your book!
Re: Twitter.
I moved to micro blog. Much quieter, but in a good way. Sort of reminds me of early days of Twitter, but this time there is a slight barrier to entry which hopfully keeps trolls out.
If you need an old horror movie, I recommend “Evil Dead” and it’s sequels. We watched the first last night. It’s fantastic!!!
The wife and I have been bingeing our way back through Eureka, and have just made it through most of the episodes with Parish. Really appreciate what you did with a character who could have been just a stereotypical arrogant jerk. The flashes of charm he puts on at times were quite believable; he’s a guy who has no patience with fools, but will put in every effort to butter up those he admires or desires. However, the best was the transition after the matrix version of him gets conditioned to play nice, and how earnestly positive he acts towards his previous enemy, Fargo. Well played.
Enjoyed this post. I think you will find Twitter does make a difference in terms of traffic, I think it also makes a different in terms of gaining positive perspective. You seem much less burdened. I have been of Twitter for a long time and FB for a few weeks and it really opens up the mind. Glad you and yours are well!
That second to last paragraph ❤️❤️❤️ Tomorrow will mark 11 years married to my Husband and best friend. When shit hits the fan, I tend to think of the lyric from the No Doubt song ‘Underneath It All’ 🎶 And when it’s really bad I guess it’s not that bad 🎶
Looking forward to the novel and glad you’re summer wasn’t more than mildly inconvenient. 🙂
I was so happy when I got the email notification of a new post (I subscribe to the blog)! At your suggestion I too deactivated my Twitter account, thereby cutting myself off from Anne, unless she also deactivated her account. Let’s hope this makes a difference! Anyway I will take my Wheaton fixes wherever I can get them. I’m really excited about your novel! I know it will be wonderful because I know the author to be a great and talented human! You and Anne are my favorite people in the whole world and I’m so happy you found each other. Take care and stay in touch!
Laurie
I read your blog, forget twitter!
Thank you for putting “mild inconveniences” in perspective-although any insurance company that refuses to cover mold should be run out of town (the state, country, world) on a rail. I’m bailing tomorrow on Twitter because they refuse to police themselves and take responsibility for the violence and hate being spewed on their site. Much as I love my TVG guys, Tom Everett Scott, Jane Lynch, Tom Bergeron, Tom Hanks, Kristin Chenoweth, Julie DiCaro, Mark Hamil, Carrie Muskat and all the truth tellers, I can’t go on a site that allows verbal threats, lies and abuse to prosper without consequences. It’s like the old “Liberty Valance” line, “when the legend becomes fact, post the legend”. No excuse. Thank you for taking the first step for all of us. I’ll see you over on FB.
Came here to let you know I still found your post despite your lack of twitter, and realized I probably didn’t have to. But I wanted to point out that I also hadn’t notice you’d left twitter, so there’s that. Thanks for being you, and congrats on enduring your summer from heck.
Having recently finished a kitchen project that took a couple months longer than it should have, you have my sympathies. I’m glad to hear the awesome perspective you’ve managed to hold onto, that you found the black mold before it got worse, and that there’s a new novel.
Welcome back. 😊
I’m looking forward to your novel (but forgive me if I’m not looking forward to your slasher pic – we’re seeing enough of that in daily life, it seems). FWIW, I signed up for your blog after your talk at the Mensa Annual Gathering (that really sticks with me), so didn’t need Twitter to notify me. With everything else going on for you, I’m sure leaving Twitter was the right thing for you (at least until it’s time to promote your book), and I wish you well in your continued adventures.
I use RSS feeds. So no fear. I hear you.
Sorry about the house and happy about the book. Guess it pretty much evens out..Right???
I’m hot and cold about twitter. I’ve blocked the Donald so it’s not so irritating, but I sometimes need a break from the noise. I look forward to your novel. I’ve remained a constant fan of your writing and will continue to receive email alerts for your blog. The inconveniences this summer?? Sometimes it is the temporary negatives that remind us to accentuate the positives. No matter what is happening in our lives, we are never exempt from the occasional choppy seas. But that makes smooth sailing so much more appreciated. Thankfulness is a choice, and you’ve succinctly outlined everything for which you are grateful. Recognizing the contrasts is part of it, but being loved and loving someone gives us the impetus to see the light at the end of the renovations. I hope you have been feeling well.
Love how you’re staying grounded in gratitude here. Keep on keeping’ on. Can’t wait to read (listen) to your book!
For what it’s worth, I am subscribed via email to see when you post new things here. If you do see a huge drop in your absence from Twitter, you could perhaps pop back on for a second next week and encourage people to subscribe to this via email.
Also, I deactivated all four of my Twitter accounts today too, thanks in large part to your advocacy. I really hope this works.
Cheers Wil.
I’m glad things have been manageable for you, but I wish they would get better in a hurry. I’m looking forward to your new book! Will you read the audiobook or have someone else do it?
I will absolutely do the audiobook.
weeeee!
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We hear you and you inspire us to move forward with grace in the face of obstacles. Also thank you for unexpected vocabulary lesson — lede. Been using the wrong word. I could be ashamed of this or be grateful that I am learning it now. Wishing you and Anne homemade meals very soon.
Still found this post, even without Twitter, but I’m signed up for updates by email. 😁
Your post got to me at just the right time. We’re on vacation right now, and our landlord called us to say that because of some plumbing mistake, our entire duplex at home got flooded with sewage overnight. We fly home tomorrow, and I’ve just been a wreck thinking about what we have to deal with when we get home.
But reading your post, like you said, at the end of the day, it’s an inconvenience. We’ll have to move out, but we’re fortunate we have somewhere to go. We’ll have to replace a lot of things, but we’ll be able to replace them. Nobody is sick or injured. We’ll get through it, it’ll just take time.
Thanks for sharing your summer story, and I hope your book is everything you want it to be!
Trust your creative process, Wil! It’s better to a little longer to get a thing right, rather than rushing and putting out only a portion of what you hoped to achieve.
Having lived through unexpected remodeling woes, you have my sincere sympathy.
Congratulations on finishing the novel. While the mold situation sucks at least it’s slowly working out. Twitter didn’t make your internet presence and it won’t break you, either. Good riddance to bad rubbish. Welcome home.
Ooof… I know that not-in-our-house-pain. About 10 years ago we had some vandalism (don’t ask!) and were in an apartment for six months while a large part of our 1901 house was fixed up. I don’t think I’ve really totally recovered from that. There is something about having Your Home yanked out from underneath you that just takes the wind out of your sails. At least yours was from Natural Causes…
Hana, eh? How’d you like that superhighway leading up to that Fine Metropolis? Did you get to try out that amazingThai food truck? We were there in mid-June. It would have been a hoot to run into you and Anne there.
Hang in there… it WILL get all put together.
Yay! re the novel! Yay! re no one getting sick from the mold, for finding so many good matches for stuff that needed to be replaced, for having honest and hardworking contractors, and MAJOR YAY for your being in a place where you are able to look at this whole debacle and be somewhat thankful for it, because of the perspective it afforded you. As someone who has both read your musings about, and has had my own experience with what I call “depression goggles,” I understand that being able to appreciate something that is not only less-than-perfect, but, frankly, somewhat terrible, is near-impossible when wearing “depression goggles,” so major yay that you seem to be currently without such goggles. Congrats! Peace and be well, always. – DJ
Thank you for this post. It helps put things in my life in perspective. An attitude of gratitude!
I’ve flown back and forth repeatedly this summer from California to Indiana for my mom’s brain surgery that keeps getting cancelled. Rescheduled for October and hope third time’s a charm. I’m thankful to have a supportive partner during this stressful time that waits patiently for me to return (and even cleans the house before I arrive home)! He’s the reason that makes it easier for me to cope staying on an air mattress squished into a room for 3 weeks at a time.
Linked here from Facebook — probably wouldn’t have seen it otherwise. Kudos on quitting Twitter — you’ll probably be much happier without having to deal with the usual asshats. And sorry to hear about your kitchen — I imagine that was a complete nightmare. But you have a healthy attitude about it so here’s to hoping you get your kitchen back together soon!
Just wanted to mention that I saw you had posted through Facebook. But I have the blog on my RSS feed anyway so I would’ve seen it tomorrow.
Congratulations on being almost finished with your novel, I’m super excited to read it. And I’m glad you’ve been able to think positively about your situation this summer. It’s a good life skill to have but one that definitely needs working at these days to keep it intact. And ultimately I think Twitter is not helpful.
Glad you are posting! and very glad your summer has overall been good for you.
Someone I greatly respect once gave the world some good advice: Don’t be a D***. Well Twitter is full of them. Good on you, sir.
Ouch. Living through remodeling sucks. And don’t worry about Twitter. It’s super easy to find you in all the other social media’s.
I just subscribe to your posts via WordPress. My Twitter is deactivated for the same reasons.
We had a black mold situation too, although nothing so dramatic as requiring ripping out a sink. Cause was deteriorated waterproofing on outside of bedroom wall in stucco building and driving rain. Insurance company refused to pay. Said not covered. Explanation given was that removing mold is deemed to be the same as “remodeling”, that it was an optional improvement and not covered. Our claim was quite small. I fired our insurance agent and our insurance company.
Our new insurance agent is Markus Brox. Excellent so far. Haven’t had a claim to put him to the test. Found him on LinkedIn.
I was wondering why I hadn’t seen any Tweets from you! I always liked following you on Twitter…but yeah, it is chock full of idiots and nasty people.
I’ve been away from Twitter for almost a month and it is so peaceful without it…it appears people are finding your posts anyway! I’m glad you’re finding the silver linings, and hope the renos are done soon!!
I get your posts here as emails. I read it through on my email client and don’t really click through to see the post, unless the post has pictures or whatnot. I doubt that the way I keep up with your blog hits your metrics so please bear that in mind!