Author: Wil

Anne is spending the day with her friend and her friend’s daughter, out at some health club that’s allegedly got a really nice set of swimming pools. She just called me and said, “I know you’re writing, but I just had to tell you — I’m sitting here between a little kid pool, and the regular pool, and there are these two little girls in the little kid pool. One of them just said to the other, ‘Well, I don’t want to pee in this pool. Let’s go into the big people pool.’ And they did.”
“So I guess you’re not swimming today?” I said.
“Probably not.” She said.
“Unless you go in the little kid ool,” I said. “I hear that there’s no ‘P’ in it.”
“You did not just say that,” She said.
“Hey, they don’t swim in your toilet . . .”
“I’m hanging up now,” she said. I could hear a smile in her voice. “I love you.”
“I love you too.”

All you Family Guy fans, get ready to have a sexy party:

LOS ANGELES (Hollywood Reporter) – “Family Guy” creator Seth MacFarlane is preparing his long-awaited direct-to-DVD movie based on the exploits of his cartoon clan for a Sept. 27 release.
“It’s been an enormous undertaking to juggle this with doing 35 new episodes of the show, but we think it turned out great,” MacFarlane said of the film, his first full-length feature, and the first direct-to-video ever made off a television franchise.
The 83-minute, unrated “Family Guy Presents Stewie Griffin: The Untold Story” ($29.98) is based on the animated series MacFarlane created for Fox Television in the late 1990s. The irreverent series, aimed at adults rather than kids, went on the air in early 1999 and was canceled in 2003, only to be resurrected last month after an overwhelming demand for the show on DVD.

I’d like to take a moment on this beautiful Sunday morning to wish my dad a Happy Father’s Day. I love you, Dad.
And a Happy Father’s Day to all you other dads out there, especially my fellow stepdads. I don’t know what it’s like for you guys, but Father’s Day always feels a little weird for me, because it’s the only day in the entire year that I really feel like I’m just the backup goalie.
So, from one stepdad to another, I salute you, my brothers. 🙂

A week ago, while I folded clothes and put laundry away, I realized that most of my T-shirts were pretty much worn out.
So I decided to do a little online shopping at Think Geek.
I picked up a couple of cool shirts, including The Geek Workshirt and The Wargames T-shirt. I got a T-shirt for Ryan that says “Schrödinger’s Cat is dead” on the front, and “Schrödinger’s Cat is alive” on the back, and I picked up this hilarious shirt for myself that says

> SELECT * FROM users WHERE clue > 0
0 rows returned.

I decided that I’d wear my hilarious SQL query shirt today, so when I got out of the shower, I grabbed it off the counter, pulled it on over my head . . . and realized that I’d put it on backwards.
0 rows returned, indeed.

This comes from Warren Ellis’ blog (which I am stunned to realize wasn’t in my RSS subscriptions until about 42 seconds ago), via boingboing.
Quoth Xeni:“This is so 0111001101110111011001010110010101110100.”