It is five in the morning. After a little over four hours of restless sleep, I got out of bed before my tossing and turning woke up Anne. I’m not sleeping much recently, and what sleep I do get is plagued by nightmares.
It’s been raining all night, which I realize isn’t something worth mentioning for most people, but it hasn’t rained here in Los Angeles since 1856, so it’s kind of a big deal. Back in the old days, when it rained a few times a year, before the myth of climate change tricked us all into believing that we’re having a terrible drought that apparently doesn’t really exist, we would sleep with the window open on rainy nights, so we could hear and smell the rain.
My dogs looked at me with confusion when I got out of bed, then did the dog equivalent of shrugging their shoulders and burying themselves back into the covers. My cat wants me to let him out, stop the rain, dry off the patio, and then let him back in. And then back out. And then back in again because he’s a cat.
So. Let’s get to it: we’re fucked. Nothing matters, everything is terrible, and we’re living in a nightmare that hasn’t even begun to hint at how bad it’s going to get. I’ve been spending a lot of time going through the stages of grief, and though it’s mostly a lot of anger, I’m bargaining: maybe the Electoral College will step in and prevent this fucking catastrophe from happening. Maybe the vote will be audited in some of these states where the devil won by just barely over one percent, which is honestly kind of suspicious. Maybe the Democrats in Congress will be joined by a few principled Republicans (they exist, right? They have to exist, don’t they?) and the white nationalist cabinet this president elect wants to install won’t be confirmed.
Bargaining. I know it isn’t going to happen. I know we’re fucked.
Twenty-five percent of eligible voters elected a racist demagogue who has never held a single elected office in his life, a seventy year-old man who has the temperament of a child. I still can’t believe it. When I hear the news say “President Elect Trump” it turns my stomach. It’s such an affront to the country, to the office of the presidency, it feels like it isn’t real.
Hate crimes are happening all over the country. White supremacists, anti-semites, and the absolute worst of humanity feels validated by this election, and they are boldly and fearlessly attacking people, declaring that this election — votes cast by one in four eligible voters — endorses their hateful, bigoted, regressive world view.
Anger. This never should have happened.
How can so many people, even if they are a statistical minority, have no problem supporting a racist for president? What are these fucking idiots going to do when all the things he promised them don’t happen? They say they were voting against corruption and lobbyists and Establishment Washington, but one look at the men this narcissistic sociopath wants in the highest positions of government reveals that none of those things will be reflected in his administration. They won’t get their jobs, they won’t get their draining of the swamp, but we’re all going to get the racism, bigotry, ignorance, and white supremacy they had no problem voting for.
Denial. Somehow, someone is going to do something to stop this from happening. He’s breaking all sorts of ethical rules. He’s breaking diplomatic norms. He doesn’t even want to live in the fucking White House! He doesn’t want the job, he just wants the attention. This can’t be happening.
And back to Anger. And then more Bargaining.
And Depression. So much Depression.
Paul Ryan is going to destroy Medicare, just because he can. Because he is a selfish, evil, despicable man. For the first time in the history of the nation, the Senate refused to confirm a Supreme Court justice (and apparently even the fucking Democrats who we’re supposed to count on to fight back are fine with it) and now our nation will deal with a regressive, right-wing majority on the court for the rest of my life. The Republicans are going to roll back and undo and destroy as much of the social progress of the last 40 years as they can, and in the richest country in the world, our citizens will suffer needlessly, because people like Paul Ryan subscribe to a selfish, hateful, myopic philosophy created by an asshole who never had to experience the consequences of her bullshit.
All of this, and more, because of twenty-five percent of voters.
Oh, there’s Anger again.
And so it goes, this cycle of grief, for my country, for the freedom and hope and opportunity I’ve always believed is fundamental to the American identity, for my fellow humans who are going to suffer now and in the future.
All because twenty-five percent of voters looked at this despicable, hateful, ignorant liar, and voted for him and everything he represents.
236 thoughts on “America the plum blossoms are falling”
Hang in there, we’re all thinking of you guys up here in Canada.
I’m glad to see someone else putting this into words. The shock has yet to truly wear off for me. There’s talks of recounts in several key battleground states, and only god knows what to expect over the next year (let alone the next four). All I know is that most of my friends are going to be affected by the way Trump’s presidency goes, and quite frankly I don’t know any more what the hell I can even do to help them. I feel helpless to do anything right now, but I know that I can’t give up on the things that I believe in and care about. Not now, not ever. I know it’s hard to keep pushing forward right now, but if we want to let the world know there are still people out there who care, we have to continue to be the people who care, as brazenly as possible. After this election, I understand taking some time to catch your breathe (I have had to as well) but if we aren’t willing to push this country in the direction we want it to go with every ounce of energy we’ve got, who will?
Well said. My feelings exactly.
I want to give you my view from the UK about everything has gone on in both the UK and USA.
The manipulators have won and more importantly sanity has lost. Two campaigns which frankly should have needed very little to win have been lost due to poor strategy and what appears to be a lack of unity and effort.
In the UK the Brexit campaign was won by a combination of outrageous lies which were accepted at face value as well as a non-unified front which appeared uncaring and unenergetic. The Brexiteers gave it vim and vigour – stood on a podium and blamed everyone else for our woes. Many voted to leave the EU with genuine financial reasoning but that victory has elevated hate crime and discrimination by monsters who wouldn’t have the balls to come out from beneath their rocks without this popularist view.
From this side of the pond it looks like the same thing as happened in the US; the Republicans couldn’t get a genuine contender together and so ended up with Trump whilst the democrats ended up putting forward a candidate who appeared to be “the next logical step” in a time when the climate needs a shake up or at least a proactive response. I know you campaigned for Clinton (but can I assume that you did this as a supporter of the democratic party and in opposition to Trump rather than a true supporter of Hillary?) but she was a candidate who frankly was very difficult to connect with.
Globalists, communists and anti-white Whites are as dead as Wil Wheaton’s career. 🙂
Says a clown.
Look, you compassionless trolls… This is Wil’s personal blog, where he should be to be vulnerable and express his personal feelings without being attacked. If you want to troll for a political fight, take it to social media, where there’s no end of opportunity for that. Give the guy a break. How about some Christian values, like love, compassion, forgiveness, walk a mile in his shoes, do unto others?
I hate compassionless trolls too. But, they voted for both candidates.
Nobody doubts this is Wil’s personal blog. I have been a reader of his for years. But this is PUBLIC blog, an opportunity to express his feelings to everyone. He has that right, I have no problem with that. That means we have a right to respond. If he is allowed to publicly state his political position, then so am I – which causes a political fight, it takes two.
“Give the guy a break. How about some Christian values, like love, compassion, forgiveness, walk a mile in his shoes, do unto others?” I understand, but I disagree. Explaining your position, which is what he is doing and what others are doing, does not make you un-Christian. How about you walk a mile in the shoes of those that disagree with you.
My comment wasn’t directed at everybody who disagrees, just at those who are name-calling and making ad hominem attacks. I didn’t name anyone because I didn’t want to start a flame war with individuals. There are some comments here that are just plain mean and demeaning to Wil, which has nothing to do with the merits of a political position.
“My comment wasn’t directed at everybody who disagrees, just at those who are name-calling and making ad hominem attacks.” I do not want a flame war either. I apologize if it came across that way. I also am not a troll, just tired of how nasty some of these folks are being towards Trump supporters.
Nobody has the right to post comments here, Wil allows comments. I have two public blogs but have the comments turned off (in my case because I rarely got comments, people more frequently comment to me on Twitter and Facebook). Commenting on blogs isn’t a right, it’s a privilege.
Sorry Joshua, poor choice of wording. But, Wil does allow comments. So, within that privilege, I will respond. Especially, when the rhetoric is so fiercely negative.
My thoughts exactly.
Amen brother. Feeling the same, and not sure what is actually going to happen. He’s already waffling on many subjects, but then re-waffling back to original stance, based on who he’s talking to. We as a nation are in serious trouble.
I echo your feelings Wil. When i saw the projections come in one after another, my heart plummeted and I felt a chill vibrate over me. I am turning 40 soon, and I wish I could dial back to my childhood because despite all of the abuse and pain I had to go through – it can’t even compare to the thousands of people who have turned on the principles of this country. Is this our Eugenics War? Is this the battle that will define our future as a people. I wonder. I feel like a stranger in a strangeland or better yet transported to the Twilight Zone.
This snippet from Neal Stephenson will heal your soul, or at least salve it. It’s maybe the most awesome answer to a stupid question in the short brutal history of upright hominids. It serves as a reminder that with wit and goodwill, we can turn nothing into something. If he can turn a banal trope of a question into this answer, then we can certainly, with some work, glean some progress out of the current situation – provided we can find it within ourselves to be creative enough to do so.
He mentions it in his most recent book: “Some Remarks”, (a great read) but here it is for you in all of its Stephensonian glory. It is his response to a question posed in the… I think… the comments section of his blog:
“Mr Stephenson, who would win in a fight between you and William Gibson?”
I understand your dismay. I teach government and I have had to temper my fears and anxieties with optimism for the benefit of my students. I rest assured in the fact that we have had worse presidents than Mr. Trump, and we will in the future. Our nation is exceptional at surviving upheaval, we were born from it after all.
However, while I have to temper my disdain for the current state of affairs you, sir, do not. Indeed you must not.
There is a divide between the wireless generation and those who hold office, and so long as we keep our concerns to the internet we will not be taken seriously, but you, sir, you are connected in a way we are not. Please sir, do not dismay, but rather lead. Encourage others to campaign, vote, run for office, protest, publish, watch and report. You can spread this message better even than I can as a teacher. People choose to listen to you, and the are forced to listen to me.
Personally, I will continue to to,my part to raise discontented youth with a sense of civic duty to question and resist. All I ask is you help me.
Wil, the haters are easily propagandized and the lovers not so much. That’s what I currently am thinking has happened here. Just see all the reporting now coming out about the fake newsers and Russian involvement. So it is a wake-up call regarding the type of people we are living amongst. Heck just see some of the comments here — the Kool-Aid haters are easily spotted. Also remember that Clinton’s vote advantage is 2M+ and climbing so there is still A LOT of advantage to the “love” side. Love to you, and hang in there as best as possible. 🙁
I think, at this point in the discussion, everyone needs to stop and breathe and then do what the ancient Mayans used to do on a regular basis: give themselves a chocolate enema. Cocoa beans are indigenous to the Western Hemisphere, and the Mayans engaged in this practice to invigorate enlightenment and therefore achieve spiritual nirvana. Think about it. These are the same people who charted the stars without the benefit of modern telescopes; built massive structures without the help of draft animals; and developed a writing system without any outside influence.
On that note, have a nice weekend, brothers and sisters. Kisses and hugs! 🙂
There’s another way to totally deal with the bullshit that’s probably gonna eat-up some of the world over the next chunk of time. And it’s not that hard to deal with. The main, most totally important question you have to ask yourself is:
“Will this bullshit that’s coming down affect WHAT I PERSONALLY WRITE/CREATE/PRODUCE or will it affect THE WAY I WRITE/CREATE/PRODUCE anything at all??? Because, concerning just yourself, and your own output, the answer is probably ‘NO’!
‘Yes’, It surely will be a drag to have to deal with some of the residue from that bullshit, but the bottom line is still that ‘YOU ARE A CREATOR’ of your own really good shit, and THAT’S NOT GONNA CHANGE, no matter who’s sitting in the fucking chair in the white house!
I don’t want to speak for Wil, but the problem is bigger than anyone’s personal interest and abilities at this point. We all share a country, and that country has essentially just turned to shit. I for one thought “we” were better than a banana republic. I was wrong. Sad.
So much hyperbole. The direction of the USA will change about 5%. That’s it. Most elections find 49% of the country bummed with the result. But they get over it. Its sad to see such a great number of people unable to cope with a result they dislike.
Wil- Having read through just a few dozen of these comments and watched it degenerate into atypical troll-fest where conservatards Trump-splain to you how liberals are delusional rather than offering any iota of sympathy for your legitimate feelings on this utterly unique election cycle — even to the extent of implying that you need mental help and your mind has been infiltrated by a cabal of nefarious liberal propagandists — and then illustrate just how clueless they are about why anyone would find Trump abhorrent, refuse to take responsibility for voting to burn down the country, and imply we’re just “mad about losing” — having as I said read through this rot just makes me more depressed, as it perfectly illustrates how a sizable portion of the population does not deserve U.S. democracy and prosperity and will keep throwing it under the bus until it’s gone. Then will blame liberals, immigrants, Muslims, et al, for the result of their own actions. BOHICA. The light at the end of the tunnel is that they are still a minority, and changing demographics are against them. They will lose eventually, it’s just taking a lot longer than anyone anticipated due to the failed electoral system originally set up to favor the slave and plantation owners. If we counter any attempt to institute fascism and somehow manage to do something about global warming, we may have a real chance at coming out the other end of the dark tunnel of stupid (which Sagan warned about in his last book over 20 years ago) into the light of day again.
Hang in there Wil, and I will too. We’ll all get through this. Don’t give up.
A few years of drought in California does not “equal” climate change. There was a drought in California that lasted 240 years that began in the year 850. Climate changes in cycles lasting longer than people care to remember. Making it an issue that allows democrats to extract tax revenue is a recent phenomenon.
Wow, Steve, two strawman arguments in one short comment. Well done! :s
I’m late to reading this, and I might have had a more depressed comment if I’d read it earlier. The North Dakota pipeline has just been halted, and my eyes are tearing up, because this is HOPE. This is what the power of protest can do. We can do this, but we can’t be silent. Hang in there!
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