and …. breathe

I just realized that I’ve been holding a tension in my shoulders and a tightness in my chest for the last four years. Every minute of every day, without realizing I was doing it. It’s only now, that it’s gone, that I realize how heavy it weighed on me.

Having an abuser as president was so hard for me, and millions of other people who are abuse survivors. Every day was a trigger for something. It was exhausting. It hurt. (I’m sure I don’t have to tell you. You were there.)

I feel this incredible sense of relief, like the worst storm I’ve ever experienced is finally gone, and the sun is peeking out from behind the clouds.

I’m going to go outside, and soak it up.

68 thoughts on “and …. breathe”

  2. Hi. I just found ur blog.. I watched ur old movie Stand By Me. It was 1986 .
    Btw, I am from Malaysia..

      1. Wil, I came here to compliment you on your reading of Bill Gates’ book. That was just a wonderful delivery – it felt like Bill was sitting in the car next to me passionately and naturally talking to me about that subject.

        Now I saw this and I’m really blown away – that response, back then was wonderful.

        As the previous poster said, take a bow man. Nice nice work at life and doing what you do!

  4. Good afternoon. I just discovered your posts. It has been interesting to read about your journey. I find it interesting to see how survivors of parental abuse each take different paths. While we remember the pain and loss, we either stop the generational abuse or continue the vicious cycle. I applaud you on your ability to heal and be a good father. For whatever it’s worth, well done sir.

    Adrian

  5. Growing up in a household where the only acceptable choice is to be a Republican, thank you for sharing this. (Even if I am late to the party.) It is hard to come to terms with much of my upbringing supporting sexism, racism, ableism, abusive behaviors, etc. The sexism and racism I see in my family every day is sickening. I am an adult now and see kinder, better ways for society and government to be. Biden will not be perfect (no president is), but at least the cultural tide is turning.

    P.S. Wesley Crusher was a comfort to an academically gifted autistic girl with anxiety like myself. I wished I could be confident and daring like him, making mistakes but growing along the way. Wesley, Spock, and Data ( who I all see as having autistic traits) got me through the times when I felt I had to pretend I was not autistic to be accepted and let my parents pretend their daughter was normal and not having panic attacks in class. I was worried about my love of Star Trek becoming an autistic special interest (intense hobby) because of my shame over special interests in the past. But I am done with that. Wesley Crusher got me through a lot, even though I hid it from myself, but no more. Thank you for giving me a character to identify with. I am no longer ashamed of it. I thought you would want to hear this story.

  6. Just watched Rent-A-Pal (2020) because Wil Wheaton was in it. Not a bad horror flick. Will was good as Andy the creepy video Pal. A bit of a commentary that isolation and lonliness can drive you mad.

  7. Hi Wil,
    I recently joined twitter and was sad to see you weren’t there. I then looked up the reasons why and came across this blog. I’ve enjoyed your work over the years and am thankful to you for it. I’m always hopeful that actors I like are decent people. You seem like you are.

    Take care,
    Larry

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